Pen to Paper
by Sanciai
Summary: Journalist Kinomoto had been following after popular singer Li and her stories of him sell remarkably well. Her utterless success gave her way to unlocking his secret but instead of revealing it to the public, she decided to unravel more of it on her own.


**Disclaimer: **I do not own the plotline and characters, or anything else related to Card Captor Sakura.

**Summary:**

Journalist Kinomoto had been following after popular singer Li and her stories of him sell remarkably well most especially to girls, young and old. Her utterless success gave her way to unlocking his inmost secret but instead of revealing it to the public, and possibly earning more for what she could have done, she decided to unravel more of it on her own.

* * *

**Pen to Paper**

_Chapter 1: Confession_

**-o-**_  
_

It's now one in the morning.

I feel so sleepy already that my eyes kept on wanting to pull me down on bed but I would always keep on hesitating. I gotta finish this short article before deadline. And I don't freakin' care if this torture is going to give me any darn eyebags!

Concentrate, Sakura… Concentrate! Okay… Let's start.

_15th of February_

_China's "Heartstrucking Charisma", Li Syaoran, was seen yesterday in Sakura Orphanage, located in Tomoeda, Japan. Though mostly every one of his fans anticipated him to reveal his 'secret date' to the public on that special day, namely the heart-warming day of Valentine's, Li Syaoran was instead found out to be spending this special moment with the children of the said orphanage._

_Phew!_ A few more words and this _baby_ will be ready to go!

Alright! So where am I? Oh! Right…

_Fangirls were deeply heartened by what they refer to as his 'angelic touch' on the orphan children, as joyous laughter was evident upon the innocent smiles of the youngsters. Who would have known that this busy superstar would rather spend his entire day teaching and playing with those adorable little faces?_

_It was unfortunate, though, that not all fangirls were able to catch a glimpse at his 'cute' deed. But brighten up, ladies!_

_TEN has captured a live coverage of Li Syaoran's 'angelic touch' and will be aired exclusively on their show later this evening at exactly 6PM, and a repeated airshow tomorrow morning at 8AM._

_Now signing off,_

_Pink Blossom—Kinomoto Sakura_

After I've finished typing, I immediately sent the file to our newspaper editor through email. I just hope I'm not too late, though…

And now that that's over, I guess it's about time that I go to bed. *yawn* I honestly got to lay my aching neck down already. I haven't slept for two days in a row… Well, nighty night!

"Angelic touch?" My roomie and dear friend, Tomoyo Daidouji, was reading my _Entertainment_ article aloud. She suddenly stressed on the _phrase of the day_, the 'angelic touch', as she mischievously took a peep at me above the newspaper she was holding with both of her hands.

"Yes?" I took down my cup of coffee and stared at her, who was sitting across the small round table in between us.

She laid the paper down on the table and slightly bent forward, leaning her impish face towards me. "And the _'fans' _called it as such?"

What's with her tone? She's making me look like I should be guilty with something I terribly don't have any idea about.

I rolled my eyes and slightly tilted my head to the right to avoid contact with her while folding my arms above my chest. "What are you trying to pull out from me, huh?"

"Oh, nothing…" She inclined back on her chair with a growing slimy grin on her face that is totally making me feel uncomfortable. "Nothing at all…"

She had my thoughts knotted in an ever so impossible way to be loosened. I just couldn't understand exactly what she was trying to point out.

I turned my face back to her and was about to speak up, my mouth already half-open, when she suddenly cut me in.

"…Well it would be _nothing _unless there's_ something_ you're _hiding_."

"W-What do you mean?" my voice stuttered.

"You know exactly what I mean, Sakura-chan."

I was silent for a moment, quietly thinking of what she meant. But to my dismay, there was nothing I could extract from my tired and empty brain. Lack of sleep is making my mind gradually lose its efficiency.

"I give up. Tell me."

She held the newspaper up high, enough to hide her face from me. "_Fangirls were deeply heartened by what they refer to as his 'angelic touch',_" she read the words exactly as I typed it down early this morning and dropped the paper again. "Tell me… Did you really mean _fangirls_? Or just fan_GIRL_?" she left me with a very unnerving question and looked at me rather cunningly.

_Oh, strike me_… So that's what she meant. Gosh. She knows me a lot better than I thought.

"Fine!" I raised my hands up in surrender. "I-I was… moved," I muttered beneath my breath so quietly that I was so sure only the two of us can ever hear what I just said.

"Sorry, I don't think I caught that. Could you please repeat?" She was clearly teasing me already.

"What he did was pretty heroic to those kids and… I-I—uh… I was MOVED, okay?" I don't know why I was making a fool out of myself in front of her when I could have just said something smarter like—I don't know… Something.

"Only _you_?" Another _making-me-look-stupid-and-guilty-type-of-question_ followed right after.

"NO!" I immediately defended. "Of course other fangirls were also moved by what he did."

"But?" she asked with a hint of laughter.

"BUT!" I repeated, and I continued to explain myself. "Ugh… I—uhm… The _'angelic touch'_ just popped out of my mind. I didn't hear it from any other fangirl but from myself… THERE! Happy now?"

So there you have it… The reason why my articles about the _charming_ Li Syaoran always sell to other fangirls is because I, myself, am simply one of them. Obviously because of that, I am able to express my idolism for him just as faithfully as how his fangirl would wish to express herself on paper; and that, my friends, is what makes me a fruitful _Li Syaoran_ follower and journalist.

"I'm always happy for you, Sakura-chan."

"Thanks."

"His fangirls are pretty lucky to have you around."

I laughed softly, thinking that she was perhaps only joking. But to _flatter_ myself, I took it as more like a compliment. Hehe… "And what made you say that?" I asked, hoping to hear more praises that would truly please my ears.

"Well," she shrugged. "…without you, who else would go crazy _stalking_ the guy and updating the girls with news about him?"

Okay. Flattery's gone.

_Excuse me?_ Did I just hear her defining my actions as _stalking_? That is completely absurd! A professional writer should, I say, NEVER be referred to as a _stalker_!

I drifted a hand over my forehead and gently rubbed my temples. "Tomoyo…" I raised an eyebrow slightly higher. "…How many times do I have to repeat myself? …I am NOT _stalking_ him." I kept my voice low and soft though inwardly, I felt a bit irritated.

"Oh, Sakura-chan!" She giggled and fluttered her hand at me, as if she was trying to shove off what I just told her. "I was _only_ k-kidding," she said as she was obviously trying to contain her laugh.

Yeah, right. Her mischievous grin said so.

She's being ironic. She WAS kidding me when she said '_she was only kidding'_. I could tell she truly meant what she mentioned earlier, me stalking Li.

I simply rolled my eyes and cared to take a look at the time on my pink digital wristwatch. And after having a see at it, I couldn't mutter anything else but, "Geez. Just great."

I quickly took my jacket that was hanging on the chair I was sitting on, and rushed towards the door.

"Sakura!" Tomoyo stood up as soon as my hand held the knob. "You're leaving me already?"

"I wish I could stay a little longer, Tomoyo-chan, but I got news to catch," I answered and opened the door right after.

"Li again, I presume." She crossed her arms and gave me that _I-knew-it_ look.

"Eheh… Right." I stepped out of the room before bidding goodbye. "See you later, Tomoyo-chan!"

"See you too, Sakura-chan!" she waved. And before I can finally close the door, she caught up with a few more words to throw at me. "Goodluck with _stalking_ Li!"

Ohoho… Nice catch up.

"WHATEVER!" I rolled my eyes again over her silly _encouragement_ (if that's how she would call it though I take it as not!) and slammed the door behind me before hurrying my feet to take me out of the apartment.

**-o-**

I patiently waited for my turn to personally interview my_ idol_—Wh-what I meant was… to personally interview Li Syaoran. Ahahah… I'm actually lucky I didn't arrive here too late or I'd be waiting in a much longer line, no thank you.

While I was waiting for his PA (personal assistant) to call my name, I sealed off my mind from the real world and focused on my own thoughts. The tense was getting into me as I mentally constructed a few questions that I will be throwing at the star later on. I was so concentrated on doing so that I think I was already loudly talking to myself, unconsciously, that is.

I looked sideways and realized that the others (who were also scheduled to conduct a private interview), previously seated beside me, already budged away. I guess they were frightened by how I acted, which was quite evident, really, through the terrified expressions on their faces. But I didn't bother… They can't blame me! I'm honestly quite excited! This will be the first time I'll ever get to meet him face-to-face! But I'm nervous too, to say it frankly.

I just hope I won't jumble my words or even dare to stammer by the time I meet him.

"Miss Kinomoto of Tomoeda Entertainment Network?"

_Ooh!_ That's me! She just called my name!

I stood from my seat in a manner which you'd somewhat call _lady-like_. My composure was surprisingly smart just so that they'd regard me as one of the fine professionals (I flatter myself too much, I know). And I slightly lowered my head before returning my gaze at her with a gentle smile.

"That would be me," I spoke.

"Aaaaaalright then, please follow me."

I followed her back until she led me standing before a door which I suppose would direct me to Li Syaoran.

"You're only allowed five minutes so make it a fruitful conversation," she instructed.

_Five minutes?—!_ She's joking, right? How in the world am I going to turn it into a _fruitful_ 'conversation' within five freaking minutes? But it's not like I'm in the position to complain. I, myself, saw the length of the waiting line outside (I even was from it too, to be exact), and so I suppose that would explain why she could only lend each of us such a detestable amount of time.

Gosh… I didn't know _his_ schedule would be this hectic.

"Well? Are we settled on that?"

I quickly nodded, forced to agree, after snapping out from my inward whining…

Once she opened the door for me, I felt a gentle breeze blowing against my face. It was like I was crossing a majestic threshold that would lead me to _heaven—Syaoran's heaven…_ I began to gleam as I entered, and there I saw _him_ bursting with blinding light as he was reaching out his hand to me. _Ohhh! _The smile on his face melts my heart! Syaoran, love! Don't worry! I'm already here to—

"Miss Kinomoto? Are you alright?"

_Oh, strike me!_ I was daydreaming again—and in front of Li-san!

He stood there like prince charming, his hand still reaching out to me. And I stared at his soft hand, imagining how I should take it… or even _caress_ it… Hihihi…

"My hand isn't dirty, if that's what you're thinking. I just washed, so don't worry."

"Oh, no no no no!" I quickly shook my hands, my face turning red with embarrassment. "It's not like that, really! I-I was just—uhm— observing how… clean your hand is!"

What a stupid excuse! Really, Sakura… First time to meet him this close and you're acting so stupid!

"Well, uh…" he scratched his head. "If you don't want to shake hands then," he began and lowered his arm, "…it's okay. I suppose we could just—"

I quickly took his hand before he could take his seat and shook with him nervously as I laughed quite oddly, a bit high-pitched I believe. And I could tell from his turn of phrase that he was beginning to feel quite uncomfortable around my presence. Simply put, I think he was beginning to think that I'm weird… _Pooey_…

And I abruptly let him go when I realized I already wasted ONE MINUTE doing so much non-sense!

"R-Right…" He coughed, clearly in a pretentious manner, and offered me a seat. "So uhm… Shall we?"

"Yes, of course!"

We sat on separate couches that were facing each other. I took my tape recorder, notepad and pen from my shoulder bag and had them ready before we could begin the conversation.

"Okay, uh… I assume that you're aware of the fans' eagerness to know just who this _secret date_ is, the girl rumored to be your _so-called_ girlfriend."

"Yes. I'm very much aware of it. In fact, I believe I just read an article about it in the newspaper this morning," he stated, a grin growing upon his face. And I think he's purposely trying to hit me with it.

"Oh! eheh… Of course, of course… Anyway, what I truly wanted to ask is if the rumor is true, about you having a girlfr—"

"It is true," he answered straight to the point, without even letting me finish.

I was truly dumbfounded with his quick response. His words were like daggers that eventually pierced through my weeping heart… NOOOOO! I can't believe it! I-I-I-I thought it was just a mere rumor! A gossip! And I was _this_ close to winning him—no… not really, but… I still can't believe what he just said was—

"But that fact was done for years ago," he added out of the blue. The smile on his face was gradually fading.

"Uhm… S-Sorry? What was that again?" I asked him, wanting to confirm if what I heard was correct.

"I lost her years ago, even before I started on my career as a singer. But I can't tell you why, though," he softly chuckled after his last statement.

"Yes, yes… I understand. Private and personal matter," I smiled, my hopes raised up! I know it's selfish of me to be so happy after hearing what he just said but I can't help it! Anyway, he doesn't seem too affected either… which was kind of a bother. I couldn't tell if he already got over her or if his former relationship with _whoever-that-girl-is _didn't mean a lot to him.

"Kinomoto… Sakura, right?" he suddenly asked.

"Y-Yes… Why'd you ask?" I gulped. I could sense something shadowy or mysterious from the smile he's holding on to.

"Nothing big. Just that, my manager often mentions your name. He said you're the _trustworthy_ type of writer, unlike the others who always make senseless gossips from everything I do and say."

"Why, I—uhm… Thank you…" I muffled, very much flushed by his compliment though it did not directly come from him but from his manager.

I was fully aware and conscious of the point that I was only wasting this precious time simply chatting with him when in actual fact, I should really be interviewing him and writing down the details. From the time when he started the conversation, I couldn't bother to interrupt… In all honesty, I was happy _wasting_ my five minutes with him. I suppose you can say I wasn't in my good state of mind not to even care that I might be leaving this room without being able to give our editor-in-chief what he had asked of me.

"Since I trust you as well," he said and stood from where he sat, "…I guess I can carry on with this proposal…"

_Proposal?_ What did he mean by that? Is he—oh my gosh! Is he going to propose to me? But isn't this going way too fast? We just met! Oh my gosh oh my gosh oh my gosh! And he's already walking towards me!

"Sakura," he gently called my name and kneeled down on one foot.

"Y-Yes, L-Li-san?" I was stammering, my heart beating faster as I felt his every breath touching my skin.

He took both of my hands and grasped them so tight, as if he would never want to let them go. "I have a confession to make…"

I swallowed and looked down on him nervously causing me to begin sweating. "W-W-What is it?"

"Sakura… I…"

"Yes?" I stared deeply into his handsome amber eyes.

"I'm…" I saw his throat swallowing. He's probably nervous of what he's going to tell me as well. "…_gay_."

_?—!_

My world began to color itself black… I was all alone in my own thoughts, secretly howling and crying over such a RIDICULOUS confession! Everything around me began to crack. His words ended MY world… and it's not even _2012_ yet! _Why?_ Why does fate have to hurt this much? I thought we were fated to be together but _nooooooooo_! Instead, it turns out that I was fated to be his _confidante_ for this big of a confession!

"I hope I didn't shock you _too_ much…"

His voice once again awakened me from my inner world. _Oh sure… that wasn't shocking at all—not!_

I stared blankly into thin air waiting for my five minutes to end so that I could quickly get up on my feet and run away from this hell-of-a-place. But he later blocked my view as soon as he stood back straight in front of me.

"I trust you," he winked.

Normally, I would shriek of happiness for that cute wink he gave me but after what he just confessed to me, I feel now and ever more… _disgusted_. Not that I hate, gays! No! I actually like chatting with them because they're honestly good listeners. But c'mon… I was sooooo in love with this guy and now he's telling me he's gay? Who wouldn't be hurt by _that_?

Just then, the PA girl knocked and opened the door, and she was all I was dying for.

"Miss Kinomoto, five minutes is—"

I quickly stood up and faced her. "—Over? I know," my voice sounded enthusiastic, even.

"Well, it was nice having a chat with you, Sakura-chan," Li's voice came out behind me.

I nearly choked when he added '_chan'_ to my first name. I could even tell from the PA's staggered stare at me that she herself was surprised when he called me that.

"Ahah..." I slowly turned back to him. "T-Thank you for your t-time…"

After I gave him a small bow, I immediately excused myself from their presence and left the building as fast as I could.

**-o-**

"Sakura! You look horrible!"

Tomoyo's _not-so-comforting_ words were the first thing that welcomed me as soon as I opened the door to our apartment room.

It was already dark outside when I've gone home. I wasn't really expecting to see her here at this hour because she usually goes home even later. She often works overtime at the nearby café. But her early arrival was truly timing because at that moment, she's all I ever need to talk to… or cry on, to be exact.

"Tomoyo-chan…" I called, my voice cracking with the wobbling of my eyes, and rested my face over her shoulder.

She gently placed her soft hands on my back. "What happened? Was the interview a failure?"

"It's not just that!" I bursted. "I found out that the guy I was in love with… is a… a… GAY!"

"Gay?" she exclaimed. She swiftly took hold of my shoulders and pushed me off her so that she could clearly see my face. "But the only guy I know you're so crazy about is that singer, Li!"

My eyes were wide open when I realized what I was just doing. Stupid me! I can't tell her that Li's a gay! I… I still have to confirm it anyway. What if he was just playing around with me? _Who knew?_ Maybe he's actually a big ol' jerk behind that good reputation he's imposing on the public. But why… Why would he tell me he's gay? I have to solve this before doing anything reckless…

"Sakura-chan? Did you just hear me?"

"Oh!"

Seriously, I have to stop this habit of mine… My sudden _entering-in-my-own-world-in-the-middle-of-a-conversation _type of habit…

"Li's not gay!" I took back what I just told her and laughed strangely. "I-I-I was referring to the… mailman!"

"You're in love with… the mailman?" she questioned, looking like she was beginning to doubt every word I just said.

"Yes…" I sighed. "I guess I was…" I muttered beneath my breath.


End file.
